Life is One Big Marrow!!!

I am getting seriously whistful as I approach the dreaded 40.
So, here's 20 of my achievements (well, 20's half of 40 and maths was never my strongest subject):

1. Passing my driving test first time
2. Getting my first car and driving it (badly) after passing the aforementioned test
3. Moving out of home and to another country and learning another language
4. Falling in love (but marrying the lunatic!)
5. Raising my son on my own
6. Having a loving family to support me
7. Having good friends
8. Having had a strange career with no clear career direction at all!
9. Getting a degree later on in life
10. Watching Spurs actually win a trophy!
11. Getting a new car and keeping it fairly clean and tidy
12. Finding the time to work part-time, look after the home and make time for my boy
13. Facing my phobia of flying and confronting it
14. Learning that life is a challenge and enjoying the challenge
15. Holding a huge marrow and not believing anyone could think of it as symbolising
anything!
16. The joy of downloading music onto an Ipod and then burning cd's
17. Using the internet to purchase things is no longer a mystery (although Ebay hasn't been conquered yet!)
18. The confidence that comes with getting older and not giving a damn
19. Constantly believing that life can only get better
20. Laughing as my anti-wrinkle cream defeats the latest emerging wrinkle!

It's Been a Long Summer ...

but I'm back for a bit.

Wow - what's been happening? A lot. Firstly the football ... actually, let's not go there. Once again the press have hyped up me dear old Spurs as being top 4 contenders in the Premiership and once again various top players have jumped or are going to jump ship for that fabled top 4 leaving us a club in perpetual crisis with a manager who doesn't speak English, desperately short of personnel and found out as lightweight ballerinas against tough-tackling, nitty gritty teams! The sooner the Premiership's disabanded so that the top 4 form their own superleague and the rest of us get on with contesting a league the better. That's that.

As for me, well, the diet's going well. Oh, didn't I mention the diet? And the exercise? Firstly for my back (had back problems), secondly in order to meet the man of my dreams!!! Well, I haven't met him yet but if I don't knock off some weight then no man will be able to beat a path to my door, and trip over all the other men queuing up outside just waiting to meet the wonderful me!!! Sigh, ok, the reality is the type of men I meet are rubbish. What a life!!!

How daft are flying insects???

I have to ask this question because I have noticed recently that when I am sitting at home on a sunny day I suddenly hear the odd "ting" sound. When I look up I see a fly or wasp bouncing off the windows. Are they:

A) trying to wind me up by annoying my relaxation?
B) unable to register that the inside of a home looks different to the outdoors?
C) participating in an insect extreme sport - sort of the flying insects equivalent to bunjy jumping???

Answers on a postcard to the usual address!

Public Enemy Number One

The humble plastic bag is deemed by those in government to be un-environmentally friendly. Thus a purge is going on in UK supermarkets. Marks and Spencer were last month handing out free "bag for life" bags - made of strong plastic and not the flimsy, plastic that must bear the brunt of all ills. The idea is that the feeble British shopper takes their own "bag for life" into a store if they want any means of carrying their purchases away with them. Or ... they could pay for a previously-free, bog-standard plastic bag. How paying the stores for bags that were free helps the environment is anyone's guess. In the meantime we now have to adapt to a mentality whereby we travel everywhere with a "bag for life" in the event that we are struck by a sudden urge to purchase something! Or else ... we can pay the bag tax and get a plastic bag!!! Which begs the question - ARE WE FUCKING MORONS IN THIS COUNTRY???

STOP THE BNP

Everyone will agree that London has changed immensely within the last 10 or even 5 years. There's been plenty of immigration - legal and illegal - and the fabric of society has changed. Unfortunately the nazi/fascist BNP who are contesting the London elections are fielding candidates and feeding on the prejudice of voters regarding immigration.

Yet nothing could be worse than having nazi/fascists in power. So, don't be apathetic Londoners - get out and vote and STOP THE BNP! Never give a platform to racist, fascist, Holocaust-denying scum!!!

That was an anti-BNP party election broadcast by Caroline Forbes-Kitchen

WELL DONE YOU SPURS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, yes, yes - Carling Cup Winners 2008

Moving on from Valentines Day

A lot has happened lately.

Ok, we've had Valentines Day. No, I got no cards, ecards or texts but then again - I am not dating anyone or anyone's beloved so didn't expect to get any. Neither did I send any. There's a dearth of eligible men round here. For eligible read "men with a brain". Yet, love is in the air.

Not for me but for my friend, I shall call her Janey, to keep her anonimity. Yes, Janey met a man, divorcee with kids, a couple of months ago and well ... the wedding's this week!!! Whirlwind romance, eh? Janey's daughter's still coming to terms with it though. Reconstituted families can be tough. I'll never forget when a divorced friend of mine married a widower and his daughters didn't take too kindly to it, and neither did her son. Yet in today's world, who wouldn't expect to get divorced?

I used to get whistful that I'd never celebrate a 25th wedding anniversary but really what's to get whistful about? An expensive party and a few cards? Not for me. I expect I shall continue my journey along life's lonely path and be the proverbial "Eleanor Rigby" of my day and you know what? So what!

No gongs for Knightley then?

Ok we've just had the BAFTAs here and one film that won, also tipped for Oscar glory, is Atonement featuring the brilliant James McAvoy and er, Kiera Knightley. Knightley, who seems to be forever 24 but might be nearer to 27, has never impressed me with her acting. I don't know what it is - her feigned "one of the girls but really from a rich background" background, her blonde beautifulness and the acting skills of a plank of wood? I am sorry I just don't get what the fuss about her is. I haven't seen Atonement as I have tended to avoid any film with Kiera in since I find her voice grating and her acting stiff - sort of akin to a plank of wood! No doubt her looks have helped boost her popularity as well as popularist films such as Pirates of the Caribbean and she may be a delightful geil but I just don't get the fuss. So I felt obliged to blog when I saw that people are indignant that Kiera didn't get a BAFTA and have started up polls about whether or not "our Kiera" should've been awarded one!!! Honestly, the mind boggles! No she should not! Well done BAFTA!

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY BERBATOV XXX

The things that man can do with a ball are unbelieveable!!! Should he take the unfortunate step of joining Scumchester United in the summer I may have to start watching their games with avid interest!!!!!!!!!!!!

Musical Ear Fuck

Yesterday whilst driving I had a "musical ear fuck". Hadn't had one for ages and it was totally brilliant. What am I talking about?

You know, you're driving in the car and a song you love comes onto the radio and gives you such an emotional lift. Happened with "Guns and Roses - Sweet Child of Mine" yesterday. Alas I was stuck in traffic and those around me had the pleasure of seeing me whip out my air guitar and strum along with the amazing guitar riff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Once the moment had passed I put my head down shamefully and prayed for the traffic lights to turn green!!!

London Buses Go the Way of London Tubes!

No, no, no!

You know tube journeys: Really annoying way of travelling in London whereby you're clattering and bouncing through bumpy dark tunnels in a sardine can packed full of sweaty folk all trying to avoid each others gaze for fear of being knifed, etc. And then just before you get to your destination an irritating female "voice" blurts out the next stop and where your tube will "terminate" at.

Well it's now happening on London buses! Yes - it's true. I was sat on a bus last week merrily absorbed in my own pessimistic thoughts when a female "voice" blurted out that this was bus number so and so going to so and so and that the next stop would be Warrington Avenue. Sure enough the bus stopped just past a turning entitled Warrington Avenue. Well how bloody annoying is that?! I can understand the usefulness of this for blind people and also the fact that bus doors now "beep" in a sequence when opening and closing. Yet there's so much noise pollution on a bus nowadays: One also has to put up with the constant "BEEPING" of Oyster cards being slammed onto the Oyster reader as passengers board the bus. Selfish of me, I know, but all this contrives to take me out of my dream-like state and bring me crashing back to the reality of being with dirty, sweaty folk jabbering away in whatever lingo and interrupting my thoughts! Rant over.

SPURS ARE ON THEIR WAY TO WEMBLEY!!!

A 5-1 thrashing of the auld enemye Ars*nal after 9 years of trying to beat those tw*ts!!! Well done the lads. Yet here's the problem. If we get Chelsea in the final we will secure a UEFA Cup spot next season, ,which we're probably not going to do through the League. We'll most likely lose the game. Yet if we get Everton in the final, we may win the game (and therefore get a UEFA Cup spot?) Can't predict anything but the greatest thing is having finally got one over on the Arsenal and kicked them out of a competition which they claim to have no care for yet would love to put the trophy in their cabinet!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Will I be published on BBC website???

This is an experiment:

A few months ago I joined BBC message boards under a militaristic-sounding pseudo-name. Often I've made very valid comments in reply to other posters but needless to say I have never had my comments published. So, I have just joined again under an Islamic-sounding pseudo-name. If I get anything published I will let you know!!!

You may find this a bizarre time-waster but I have a friend who lives in a multi-ethnic area. When he wrote to his local council for planning permission he was turned down. So he wrote to them under an ethnic pseudo-name and guess what? The council agreed.

There's method in my madness!